Flash Fiction: Pedestrian Crossing - A Flashing Red Light

One day, I am going to give some serious thought into a story.

But today is not that day.

So here's me goofing around, reliving some of my most embarrassing moments via this piece of flash fiction. I hope it'll strike a chord of familiarity in you as it has in me. (And maybe make you groan as it has made me.)

***

Pedestrian Crossing:
A Flashing Red Light

Layla was not always a convincing actress.

She did pretty well on stage, sure. Her delivery was always on point, even when the glaring stage lights made her sweat under all that heavy make-up. A round of applause always followed every performance. In the theatre circles, she was seen as a minor celebrity. Although of course that didn't mean much in college.

Layla was not always a convincing actress - not when there was no stage, no script, no director. Not when she had only one spectator.

This is impossible, she thought as she punched random keys - the sound too loud in her ears. She stared hard at the paper on her the desk, willing meaning into the haphazardly written numbers. She knew that with the way she had been squinting, she looked more angry than absorbed. And yet, she just couldn't relax the muscles in her face.

Not when Allen Hawke's gaze was pinning her dawn.

Summer Workin', Having a Blast!

Because of an academic calendar shift, my usual two-month summer bumming has become a five-month existential crisis. And while I detest school load as much as the next guy, I loathe the brain dead feeling slightly more. Besides, when I am left alone with my thoughts for too long I start to think about the unpleasantries that come with being a mortal. 

So for me, the next logical step was to find a way to distract myself while actually being a useful and pragmatic human being, which roughly translates to applying for an internship!

Pay day!

Fortunately, I was accepted in the companies I applied to. My first internship was with a luxury and lifestyle magazine. As a marketing intern, I made an unbelievable number of calls and e-mails, with some menial tasks here and there. I had intended to stay there until my summer semester began but because of the tiring commute and the schedule conflict, I decided to end my internship early. And although I felt like I didn't contribute as much, my boss generously gave me copies of recent issues. 

I learned much about patience and external communications there. 

I spy with my little eye...
A birdie perched on top of my shoes?!

When I realized I could not afford to stay in my first internship, I started looking for the next one. This one - my current internship - is involved with the local footwear industry scene; and I am beyond thrilled to be part of it. 

It may sound naive of me but, directly after my interview, I knew this was a job worth sticking to. And not just because it is right across my school, but more so because I believe in what the company endorses. 

Creative story-telling, nationalism, artisanry, and socially-aware entrepreneurship - Risque Designs successfully incorporates all these things in a single pair of footwear. The designs are inspired by multiple aspects of Filipino culture like myths, animals, and the Filipina woman. Made only from local materials and by the hands of local craftsmen, these shoes are without a doubt uniquely Filipino masterpieces. 

It's so inspiring! Add to that my second day of work involved helping out with a photoshoot! 

Everything is just plain awesome. 

I can't wait what else is in store for me!

Book Review: Better off Friends

“So, as I was saying, guys and girls can be friends.'

'Best friends.' 

'And what is better than falling in love with your best friend?' 

'Nothing." 

- Levi & Macallan, Better off Friends

From the title, it's ridiculously easy to gather what this book is about. 

Yes.

It's that kind of story - when best friend A falls in love with best friend B. But, of course, best friend whoever (or even both) doesn't want to risk their beautiful friendship. And, of course, their feelings are never in sync - just when one has moved on, the other realizes his/her feelings. Then shit hits the fan.  

Book Review: Isla and the Happily Ever After

"I’m beginning to think that maybe it’s okay to be a blank canvas. Maybe it’s okay that my future is unknown." - Isla, Isla and the Happily Ever After

Isla and the Happily Ever After is the third and last instalment in Stephanie Perkins' YA contemporary romance series (which started with Anna and the French Kiss). It follows the titular character, Isla, as she goes through her senior year at the School of America in Paris (SOAP). Although the story largely takes place in the City of Lights, the novel begins in an inconspicuous pub in Manhattan called Kisment. And there she meets her long-time crush, Josh Wasserstein. She's ecstatic, of course - but witless from the medication having her wisdom teeth extracted. And so it goes - that the normally blushing Isla Martin strikes up a conversation with the normally out-of-reach Josh kick starts a long overdue romance.

At a glance, this novel is nothing special. It's your normal boy-meets-girl story. The same goes for the first two novels in the series. But this is what sets Stephanie Perkins novels apart from the rest. She takes a perfectly normal story but injects she with the sweetest of fantasies and just a tad bit of naivety. Her books are unpretentious and unashamedly optimistic. You know, just from the cover themselves, what you're in for: A love story.

Unfortunately, this book turned out to be the least compelling in the series. (Incidentally, how I would rank these books would be the same as the order they were published, with Anna and the French being the most swoon-worthy of the three. Granted, Lola and the Boy Next Door only lags behind by an inch.)

My Tokyo Dream

It's been a while since I last posted. School and other extra curricular activities kept me busy, but when summer break came, there was only one thing on my mind...

J A P A N
April 9 - 16, 2015
(✿´ ꒳ ` )

But first, a prologue:

Looking back on it now, a big part of my childhood was spent sitting too close to the television screen. I would sit cross-legged while spending hours on end watching anime. And though I never left the room, I felt like I was rarely in my house. My heart was in Japan - watching the cherry blossoms fall, experiencing high school as a first grader, making pastries with hard to pronounce names, and falling in love. 

There are times people express their surprise at the things I know, and rarely do I get the chance to say, "Oh, that? I learned that from an anime I watched". Although anime has a largely bad reputation I never grew out of it. Instead, I went even further and discovered the country behind my dream-like childhood - Japan. 

Fast forward:

Roughly two weeks ago from today, I realized my dream of visiting Japan. Although I knew it my heart that I was no longer in the Philippines, everything was touched with a tinge of familiarity. Of course I had never been to Japan before, and yet there I was, feeling like it was a part of the Philippines I was just not familiar with. 

And yet, every day was full of excitement, adventure, and exhaustion. We always came back to the apartment nearing midnight, but we always found the energy to wake up the next day for more endless walking and exploring. We went to places whose names I only heard on TV -- Shibuya, Harajuku, Odaiba -- and then more, to places I have never even heard of. 

I never wanted to leave. But alas, all good things come to an end.

...

And all good things give way to even better things.

...

If everything goes according to plan, this time next year (as part of our school's Junior Term Abroad program) I'll be back in Japan. And I simply cannot wait!

***

Here are a couple of shots I took while I was in Japan, complete with my stupid commentary:

New Year's Resolution: "Like Cinderella, But Like the Opposite"

Anna Kendrick as Cinderella: Into the Woods still 

After the new year's fireworks had died out,

After the feast had all been eaten,

After the clock had struck twelve;

There was a non-Cinderella.

There was no  fairy godmother in sight. The magic, she thought, would be all up to her. 

So there she was, surveying her reflection. She wore no ball gown, but rompers. Her was not in a tight updo, but in two low pigtails. No lipstick or blush, just baby pink lip gloss. 

She really was only a girl - a girl who dreamt of love too much. As if love was just around the corner. As if it was just a matter of time. 

***

This was how I spent the first few hours of 2014, after all. In my last post, I already said my goodbyes to the year that has been. It was indeed a great year. Unexpectedly so. Which led me to ask: "Why had it been so great?" and "How can I make 2015 just as, if not more so, amazing?" And that line of questioning led me to this particular memory. 

After turning and tossing it in my head, I've honestly grown very fond of it. It felt like it could have been the night before an epic battle . I remember feeling giddy, anxious, but more importantly, I felt empowered. Sure I was waiting for prince charming, but it wasn't a passive kind of waiting. 

I knew 2014 would be the year I won't just wait around. I was psyching myself up for the next unknown, and I would do something about it.

Then I did. And while everything didn't go as I thought it'd be, I did not regret it. 

That is why 2014 was such a success for me. I didn't have any particular expectations, but I still sought out to do things. Even without a clear goal in mind, I accomplished things. 

So just as I did before, I'll go in with no expectations but with all hope and faith. Like Cinderella, but like the opposite; that's my New Year's resolution.

P.S. I'm stoked for Into the Woods!

Footprints in the Sand: A Eulogy to 2014

With the year drawing to a close, I have the perfect excuse to write a 2014 in review post. So I shall.

Truth be told, I've almost forgotten about this little blog. You could say it was an accident that I even remembered that I had one. School is ever so consistent with its demands; distractions are always only an arms' width away; and I am perpetually lazy to finish what I set out in doing. 

Whatever the case, I am back (at least for now). And as with everything old I chance upon, I could not help but re-examine this blog. I am both laughing and horrified at my old posts - the old me - who tried too hard to make herself bigger than she seemed. Especially that first post, my goodness. I want to crawl inside a hole. I am tempted edit it even though I know I shouldn't as to keep the essence of what a blog should be. But - right here, right now - I am telling you, my dear reader, that I cannot promise that I will never tamper with it //cries

And I suppose the title of this blog is an ode to that:

First, a eulogy to my old self who was overbearing with the use of big words and odd sentence patterns: She had been self-important and vain in a way that tried too hard to say she was not. While most people don't say this in funerals, I will say this: I am so glad you're my past already. I hope you stay buried. 

Perhaps I am being too mean. But most likely than not, I will end up judging myself like this at the same time, next year. Even though it seems scary (and I suppose it is), I also find it amazing. How big of a difference time can make! It's the same nostalgia I get from seeing one of my past crushes talks to me. When back then I would have been melting in my shoes from giddiness, now I would talk to them at the strange comfort of being nothing more than friends. I mean really, I am so happy that we're just friends!

The transition from one state to another is a blur but the difference between the two is everything but. It's such a stark contrast, but it's not unwelcome. This coming from someone who is deathly afraid of the future. Or perhaps I should say was.

Although I can't remember all the details that were during the year, I can say that I have learned to embrace change. Little by little. I cannot define what kind of year 2014 had been to me but I think that's exactly what it should be. It is about transition and change and growing up.

So here goes the second half of my eulogy:

To 2014,
This year I started this blog.
This year I learned to step out of my comfort zone.
This year I signed up for responsibilities that I thought I didn't have the strength for.
This year I made friends with people from my college block. Before, I had none.
This year I confessed to the boy I had been so deeply infatuated with that I still feel the sting of the scar he left me. I learned to look at him in the eyes since then.
This year I was confessed to by a boy I had believed would be the one - but only in a parallel universe.
This year I turned down a boy who probably already loves me. Whom I probably love. Too little or too much, I cannot say. (It's a work in progress).
This year I struggled with so many insecurities, so many fears, and so much happiness.
This year has been unexpectedly great and trying; and I am grateful. 

As I grow older and the years wash over me, I may forget how pivotal this year has been to me. Like footprints in the sand, the details will vanish amongst the waves. But even still, I like to think that I would at least keep the image of the sun and the sea of those days.

oh look, I guess I am still not over trying too hard to sound wise //shot